flowers are meant to fly

 good morning Helianthus

Your perfect yellow petals 

swayed in a humid summer wind
You replied with a quick nod
a how-do-you-do sort of acknowledgement 

since You had no mouth

i had never spoken with flowers before
You were tall and stoic

polite and precocious
each day the sunrise illuminated new facets 

of Your sunny disposition

i watered You like good gardeners do
and You thanked me each time

like flowers ought to

that water was the perfect way to start my day, You said
The critters aren't bothering You? i asked
Nothing out of the ordinary, You said

from time to time a yellow finch would visit
perched placidly upon Your crown
i used to shoo them away
but You said You liked avian company
they were gentle and integral
before gardeners the birds were the ones 

that sowed Your seeds

You loved the sounds they made
though You heard them differently than i did

instead of trills and whistles

the birds made sure You were growing and ripening like You should

I miss flying, You said

how can a flower fly? i asked

the birds used to carry my seeds away, You said

that must have been exciting, i said

maybe one day you’ll fly too, You said

yes i hope so, i said

the weather began to wane
death revealed in crinkled discarded foliage
i knew what the turn of seasons meant
but I didn't want to admit it yet

on a particularly chilly day
frost had nipped at Your leaves
patches of white on pristine green
it was time to reap what was sowed

mother nature had made it known

are you ready? You asked
for what? i asked
for what comes next--death, You said
i’ve never spoken to such a beautiful thing as You, i can't lose You, i said

I want you to make use of my seeds

there are more than enough to eat 

and to sow a new crop next spring, You said

i ignored Your pleas
i wouldn't do it
not ever, not yet

how could i behead a friend?
how could i sentence sentience to death?

i tended to the frilly kales and belligerent brassicas
i plucked the last obese tomato orbs
i pulled weeds until my hands blistered 

but i avoided Your beds

i left You alone

i was lonely

why are you avoiding me? You asked

i had cleared out the entire garden except for Your section

if you don't harvest me now, all will be lost

my seeds will be rotten and no good

i studied Your drooped head

Your petals ragged and limp

Your stalk leaned precariously into the frigid wind
forlornness seeped from Your leaves as You spoke

please kill me, You begged

if i kill You, i may never speak to plants again

if i kill a cognizant flower will i ever be forgiven?

if you don't harvest me

my life will be for naught

I am meant to grow and decay

please don't waste what I've made

the garden shears quivered in my hand
i was about to end a special life

to silence a self-aware flower
i held the sharp tool to Your hardy stalk

just beneath the crook of Your neck

do it, please! You pleaded

i snapped the shears shut hard

a vile crunch vibrated through 

my hands as the metal sliced 

through Your cellulose spine

Your head tumbled

down

down

down

You hit the ground 

with an ugly thud

i went to work cutting down 

the rest of the sunflowers

Your unaware and untalkative kin

they died as You did

but they didn't beg for death

for them it was easy

for me it was desensitizing

i kept Your head segregated 

from the others in the barn

You hung from the rafters

drying in the crisp autumn air

Your dangling corpse a pitiful

shrunken skull

when the time came

i shucked seeds loose 

from the other dried flowers

half of the seed would be replanted

the other half would be roasted and eaten

just as You had suggested

but You were different

i couldn't treat You like the others

i took what remained of You 

out to the edge of the hedge

where the finches lived

i sat You in the crook of a scrubby tree

i spoke to the birds

i hoped they understood

take care of Helianthus

She was never meant to be domesticated

She is one of the wild ones

scatter Her like you did before

take Her on high

flowers are meant to fly

streaks of wild yellow sunbeams 

flung themselves at You

the greedy birds nibbled 

taking advantage of Your bounty

i wept as each finch flew away

their tiny wings fluttering into the blue oblivion

each with limitless potential in their bellies

i knew You were gone

but Your seeds would be planted

and somewhere beyond the horizon

in a place You may have never saw for Yourself 

yellow flowers would again yearn to fly